Frequent Questions
What Is Consent, & Why Is It Important?
Due to the importance of Consent in the lifestyle you will find the following information repeated in several places around the site.
Consent is 100% required before you play with another person.
Consent
You must always have Positive Consent from anybody you want to play with.
Positive Consent is where they ask you to join them, or where they agree for you to join them by saying yes.
A third party cannot give consent for anyone.
Consent is not open ended. If a person agrees to play with you, the consent lasts until the end of that interaction.
If you want to play with a person again later that evening or at a future event, consent must be given again.
Denial of consent is when the person says No, or where their partner says no, or where someone already in the action says no.
- No always means NO!.
- No! never means maybe.
- No! never means yes if you keep trying.
- Touching a person after you have been told No is a sexual assault.
- Consent for rough play is not a given.
- Do not indulge in rough play unless you have been asked to do so, or the person has verbally agreed to rough sex.
- Save the scratching, biting, slapping, spitting for interactions with people who have explicitly told you that they enjoy/want to have that type of sex.
- If someone gets rough say no, if they persist, shout NO or STOP, someone will come and rescue you.
- Anyone who gets rough with another guest, or continues after they have been asked to stop will be excluded from the party and the site and banned from all future events.
- We are serious about this, we have already banned two men for breaking this rule.
- Only play with people you are attracted to, and who you want to play with.
- If someone declines to play with you, respect their decision and move on, do not get upset. The lifestyle depends on people being adults and only playing when both parties are attracted to each other.